‘What does that look like’ is an expression that is commonly used when we want to talk about the impact of an idea – moving from the theoretical or philosophical to the tangible outworking of something. In this instance the term ‘look like’ could be misleading, as though the outworking of a relationship with God is something physical or outward. In reality this relationship is hidden, and its outworking is a change on the inside of the person. That said, it is often the inner change that people notice when someone becomes a Christian and embarks upon a relationship with God; the onlooker sees this change revealed through the person’s demeanour and behaviour.

There are two things that most people experience when they become a Christian. The first is a very clear sense of freedom from the burden of guilt and shame, and from what the Bible terms ‘sin’. This is because they become deeply conscious of having received forgiveness from God – having their ‘slate wiped clean’. This forgiveness was promised in the Old Testament where we read:

He has removed our sins as far away from us as the east is from the west.

Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool.

In the classic spiritual allegory The Pilgrim’s Progress, sin is depicted as something akin to a very heavy rucksack. Christian, the main character, is burdened with carrying this load everywhere he goes, until he receives forgiveness from God, at which point it falls away and he is no longer weighed down – he is freed from his burden.

The second experience for new Christians is that they become aware of having a relationship with God. Previously they were estranged from God, but now relationship is restored. It is a relationship based on love: God’s love for them, and their response to that love. As part of becoming a Christian, we are forgiven for the wrong things that have been done in the past, and also God gives guidance for the future. This means that Christians seek to live to please God – to live the way that he shows them, and to accept his direction in their decisions and choices. It simply doesn’t make sense to ask God for forgiveness, only to continue doing whatever we like and thereby continuing to make bad choices. What does make sense is to recognise our need of direction, and to ask God to show us how to live the best way, the way that will be pleasing to him. This is like a coin with two sides: forgiveness for the past and direction for the future. It would be very sad if the coin had only one of these sides: forgiveness but no help to change our lives, or change in direction but no clearing of our ‘debt’ for the wrong things that we have done in the past.

There are different ways in which God guides Christians, but the most important is simply through them knowing him. To know God means that their consciences become sensitised to what pleases him and what hurts him. This isn’t about following rules or religious practices. Most Christians want to tell other people about God’s love and forgiveness, but often there isn’t an appropriate opportunity to actually explain about Christian faith. However, other people generally appreciate that there is something different about a Christian, maybe not through what they say, or through what they may have been told about the person, but rather through who they are. This might be because the Christian avoids using bad language or doesn’t partake in gossip; or maybe because they are more patient, positive or generous-hearted than other people tend to be. Whatever the reason, people seem to sense that there is something different about someone who is a Christian.

Having a relationship with God operates in a similar way. A Christian may not have been taught that certain behaviour is wrong, but they can sense in their spirit when they are doing things that are not pleasing to God. Whilst Christians have this relationship with God, they nonetheless have freewill and still have decisions to make. Christians still need to make the choice to do what pleases God.

There are various things that Christians choose to do in order to know God better and to understand how he wants them to live their lives. They pray regularly, conversing with God and sharing their thoughts with him. They also spend time listening to what God may have to tell them. Most Christians also take the opportunity to read from the Bible regularly. This is because the Bible is a great source of information about how God wants people to live – it has been referred to as the ‘user’s manual’ for the Christian. Christians usually also choose to meet together regularly, both for formal times of worship and learning, and informal times for sharing their lives together. All of these things are there to help Christians to understand God’s purposes and how to live the way that he wants for them, the way that enables him to bless them.

The thing about a relationship with God is that it is life-changing. When someone embarks upon this relationship through asking God to forgive them, and asking him to lead their lives, they start to change – from the inside out. It is very clear from the Bible that God is interested in what goes on inside a person much more than outside. He knows that the external reflects what is happening on the inside, and it is the inside that needs to change. This is the place where God the Holy Spirit works, starting with the cleansing that comes from forgiveness for everything that has gone before, and continuing through the renewal of the person’s motivation and thinking.